I know everyone reading this has come up with amazing idea. You’re driving, or on a jog, or maybe bored out of your mind in class or a meeting, and then it hits you.
THE IDEA
Your brain goes into overdrive about how amazing this is going to be.
But then, it happens. I called it the “No freaking way” moment or the “What the hell was I thinking” moment.
Whatever your self-sabotaging go-to might be, you know what I’m talking about. It’s what you say so you can quickly abandon your inspiration.
And why? You know you had a great idea. The thought of not doing it creates a little pain in your heart that feels like a breakup. You can literally feel it- but you brush it aside.
You know why. Because putting a great idea out there is scary. It means being vulnerable. What if people judge you? What will they think? What if you FAIL?
I’ve done this too many times to count
Whenever I feel these strikes of inspiration, followed by talking myself out of them, I feel this funny mix of pain and relief. Followed by the “thank God, I almost tried this time, and we know how that would have gone.”
Well a few months ago I decide to push past that annoying voice and decided to start this blog- which is completely out of my comfort zone.
I’ve always thought blogging was for other people. The extraverts with less fear. The people who are more open by nature and have more to give. All great excuses to never try. I certainly have that script down, so this time, I finally did decide to try something else for a bit.
And I have to be honest- It’s been amazing. Over the past few months I have learned more about websites, coding, photography, writing, photo editing, and social media than I ever dreamed I would.
And please note, I said amazing, but not always easy
I’ve had moments setting up this site that I wanted to throw my laptop across the room and curl into a ball. But that moment when the image finally posted where I want it, or the menu bar DOESN’T disappear for the 100th time, well this little victories never tasted so sweet.
Through letting go I’ve had the best time, and I’ve grown in ways I never thought I would, just by simply starting a blog. I’ve tried new things and pushed past fears I always thought were just part of who I am.
I have to say, this new perspective is freeing AND freaking scary- sometimes in the exact same moment.
I doubt myself, I critique, I worry, and then I juts breath and remember no one is going die if I just keep trying. It gets easier, and then it gets harder, and then it gets easier again.
But I’d rather have these moments than all the millions of moments when I dreamed of something and did nothing.
