Today is my Grandma’s birthday. She would have been 93. She passed away less than a year ago on August 23rd, after a long battle with dementia.
I have so many wonderful memories of my Grandma. And how could I not? I hit the Grandma Jackpot.
She was a stay at home mom to her five children.
My Grandpa, a New York City policeman, worked all sorts of hours, so she handled the household and parenting responsibilities the majority of the time, and she loved it. She loved being a mom, and later a grandma, and then a great-grandma.
Although she lived in New York and I’ve lived in California most of my life, I got to see her about once a year, if not more.
Our time together was quality over quantity, and I learned a lot during our talks.
I’m full of gratitude that I actually took the time to soak it all in. Generally, these talks came over a good game of gin rummy instead of baking cookies, but that was just her style.
Here are some little gems of wisdom from my amazing Grandma
Being Head Over Heals In Love with Your Husband is an Amazing Gift, Not a Sign of Weakness.
My Grandpa was most definitely the love of her life. They dated in high school, then he left for WWII, and when he came back, they got married. Their marriage was strong and full of love.
I saw their interdependent love as a beautiful thing, and something to embrace. They kissed, held hands, and laughed a lot. They were a team, always kissed goodbye when someone was leaving, and spooned when they slept.
Sadly, my Grandpa passed away fairly early, in 1991, so she spent a lot of her “Golden Years” without him. And there was no doubt she missed him. I can remember 20 years after he died, she’d still tear up sometimes talking about him, but through her tears she would always say that she was blessed to be his wife for the time they had.
If The Opportunity Comes Up to Travel- Take It
Once my Grandpa retired, my grandparents traveled a ton. They went to the Caribbean, drove across the U.S., and made frequent trips to Notre Dame while my Uncle was in school so they could catch a football game.
Once my Grandpa passed, my Grandma said she was so thankful they took advantage of all the chances to travel and that they didn’t wait.
When my husband and I married, she loved that we traveled. She was so excited to see us head off to Ireland or Jamaica. She’d remind us to take advantage of travel. Don’t put off a trip ’til next year because you never know what the future will bring.
A Good Beauty Ritual is Pure Joy
My Grandma loved getting her hair and nails done. And not just because of the end result – she actually loved the process. Even if it was one of her Grandkids playing salon with her as the guinea pig, she’d relax into the treat of getting pampered.
I struggle with this. I’ve gotten better, but when I get my hair colored, or have a manicure or pedicure, I feel like I’m stuck. Like I had to take the car in for maintenance. When I feel this way, I try to remember how much she loved it and I instantly relax. The task list can wait for an hour. Pampering should be enjoyed.
Ask God to Take Care of It
My whole family is Catholic. My Grandma went to church every Sunday and prayed the rosary every night. She believed wholeheartedly in the power of prayer.
Per people’s request, she’d add them to her prayer list. From someone wanting a new job, to dealing with a difficult teenager, she would pray that things would work out.
She believed that giving something up to God made life better and easier. She believed if it was out of her control, it was a sign that she should turn it over to God. And she would.
This is another thing I struggle with on a regular basis, but I know the more I do, the better life gets. And sometime I pray for my Grandma to handle it too.
Change with the Times
As my Grandma got older, she rolled with the changing times. Although she was raised really traditionally, she understood that her Grandkids were coming of age in a different time, and so she accepted our choices. When one of the cousins got divorced, or lived together without being married, she was completely accepting. She valued our happiness over the Catholic beliefs she had known her whole life. It allowed us grandkids to all stay close with her as we grew into adulthood.
I think of Grandma often. I have a photo of us at my college graduation on my nightstand, and it always makes me smile. I miss her, but her words of wisdom are in my heart forever.
